Yes, 20 more days and I shall be in Dallas preparing for graduation on the 19th of June... at 2:00PM... just 20 more days.
I didn't realize that it was so close. Time is going to fly by and I only have 15 more days to get all of my assignments finished. My last assignments aren't due until the 12th of June but I need to have everything finished by the 10th because life gets crazy right after that.
I am going to Oklahoma on the 10th and I am going to hang out with Rachel and Julie at the BASIC seminar at the Oklahoma City Training Center. Then I am going to drive down with Julie and Rachel to Dallas on the 15th where I will meet up with most of my fellow classmates and best friends while we go hang out at the mall before our first "official" day begins when the rest of my fellow AEers will show up.
I find myself thinking about AE graduation more and more these days. Assignments are finally starting to come together and I am almost finished with everything. I feel like I'm in a race against time to get them finished before the 10th and then... there's a final speech in Dallas and some assignments to turn in and get graded. Then, finally, graduation on the 19th.
I am weary. Exhausted. Worn out. Some days I don't feel like I can get out of bed and some days I really don't want to flip open the laptop screen to work on assignments. I don't want to get my grades back. I don't want to keep doing this.
But I have too. There's no way I can stop. If Christ is for me than nothing, not even myself, can be against me.
Advanced EXCEL has been the hardest thing that I have ever done in my life. This year has been the hardest year for me in my life. The past couple of weeks have been the hardest days in my life. Seriously, nothing has ever been harder than what I've gone through this year.
Is it worth it?
Is what worth it? I don't know. But I am going to find out. I am determined to finish this chapter of my life well and I am going to find out what it was that I fought so hard for. What was worth all the pain, tears, struggles, heartache and sleepless nights?
When I find it... no doubt... it will have been worth it. Because that's the way God works. Everything He ever brings us through is worth it. Everything.
20 more days...